Friday, December 9, 2011

This Will Make Your Blood Boil.

I choose the way I live for me and my family to have a deeper understanding of our God, our country, ourselves and our life. I do not do it for you or your society. If you have something to say about it say it me face to face, not the wife or the kids.

My middle daughter, A Junior in High School, came home from school yesterday and told me one of her teachers ridiculed and belittled her in front of her piers for the way I live and this not being the first time he has done it.

One way the teacher grades his students is to have them come up front once a week and put on a presentation on anything the child wants to talk about. Being my children actually love our lifestyle and all the things we do as a family, it is only natural my daughter gives presentations about our farm, projects, animals and our way of life.

Yesterday her topic was about sustainable living and in detail talked about our rain water harvesting and solar bathhouse. The teacher did not even let her finish before bursting out in hysterical laughter. She ask him what was so funny and his response was asking her if we were a bunch of hippies or something. He went on to say how ridiculous that all was and how it was a waste of time.

She tried her best to debate the highly educated man and take up for her family and the choices we made in life but a few more jokes later and trying to get the rest of the class on his side to openly discredit my daughter, she finally just sat down in defeat.
The only thing that kept my daughter from feeling completely humiliated was the class did not take the teachers side. They were saying how cool it was and they wished their family did those things. Some even wanted to come over for a tour.

I am sure you would agree that if we all acted on our first thoughts we would all be sitting in a jail cell someplace. It took every fiber of my being not to show this guy the Redneck side of me. Instead, I cooled down and spent most of the evening drafting an email. I had to be very careful in choosing my words and to make it sound non threatening. Plus writing to a English professor I sure did not want to back up his beliefs that I was an uneducated slob so I reverted back to the days of writing where I used big words and actually made sense.

This is how I started my email;
I should hope this email finds you and yours well. 
I deeply wish this is all a misunderstanding. 
My daughter has informed me you tend to openly
laugh and make fun of the lifestyle my family 
chooses to live. For one, I do not understand why
a respected teacher such as yourself would do such
a thing to demean and belittle a child in front 
of her peers. 
If it is so I have written a short explanation to 
better help you understand what we do so it might 
open your mind to maybe see the way we choose to 
live is not so bad after all and should be embraced 
with kindness and not mockery.
I went on to explain in great detail what sustainable living was all about. I even challenged him to list the most valuable aspects of his own life and to see how we do not differ much from one another after all.  

In my closing remarks I decided to take a nice little jab at his intelligence by writing;

So please, if you fill the need to laugh at,
make fun of or embarrass
my daughter about the way we choose to live,
please call me or meet me in person and I
will try and explain this in a more simpler way
where you might be able to understand it.

All anger and reaction without thinking has ever done was land me in trouble. Believe me when I say this is not how the old MDR would have handled this. I guess age does have it's benefits.   

If you were wondering, the fine teacher has already emailed me back and was very apologetic in this matter. He assured me it will never happen again and deep down he wishes he could live the way we do.
See there, I killed him with kindness and love. Maybe I am a hippie after all. 



  1. I hope you sent a copy to the school superintendent and principal for this guy's personnel file. The really blood boiling thing about this is that, had this been ridicule or derision of a "protected" group (i.e. gay, muslim, ethnic, etc.), he would be looking for a new job right now.

  2. We had a teacher that teased us about shop and ag classes. He had to pay people to hang curtains. Over educated idiot.

  3. Good on you and him for apologizing. We have issues with other children more than we do teachers here. My boys teachers seem to find it fascinating and will talk with me and the boys to know end.

    If it happens again I wouldn't be so pleasant.

  4. I just hate that this had to happen to your daughter, and I applaud you for standing up the way you did. I sure wouldn't want to be on the receiving end of an "old MDR way of handling things'!

  5. Well done, my friend. You should still send a copy (if you haven't already) to your local school board with his reply.

  6. I agree with Shepherd K and Stephen, The school board should have been copied as well. You handled it well but being the skeptic I'm afraid the teacher is in a self-preservation mode and wants to keep his job, I don't think people change their colors that quick. Another reason to home school.

  7. Good for you, this shows the narrow minded people that don'n teach our children self values, only to follow the trends. Congratulations and please do follow up with the school board.

  8. Wow that was great! I am really glad the class took your daughter's side. I agree with the others that this should probably have been brought up to the school board. I had a teacher in the beginning of 7th grade that absolutely despised me and a couple other "dumb" kids and she would openly mock and belittle us in front of the class. Only no one stood up for me(in fact the other students too would mock me). It got so bad and I was getting so depressed that I begged my mom to home school me. Hopefully this teacher got his attitude adjustment.

  9. I have been ranting about this very thing on FB. What that teacher did was plan and simple BULLING.

    I agree with Shepard K that I hope you sent a copy to the superintendent and principle. If he will do it to one child he will surely do it to another. Bullies usually back down when confronted so I am sure it won't happen to your daughter or anyone in her class. There are other classes though.

    I feel this man does not belong in the teaching field. Whether it was a protected group or not. There should be ZERO percent tolerance for bulling whether it is from an adult or child.

    MDR, I am proud of you. I know how hard that was for you to do. What you did is act and not react. That method does generally work out for the best.

    We had to deal with a teacher bulling our child once. We requested a conference with her and the principle. She retired after the completion of that year. She picked on him because he was hispanic. (Well 1/2 anyway but she didn't know that.) We calmly made our point as we had plenty of information before confronting her. With her retired that is one less bully on the schoolgrounds.

    Also I want to state that I am very proud of your daughter and her fellow students. It gives me hope knowing they will run the country one day.

    Regarding being a hippy. I have asked this question myself. What really is the difference of people into ecoliving (also known as hippies) and survivalist? To my understanding the goals are the same.

    - Genevieve

  10. That is the reason the wife and I home school our daughter. To laugh at a child for doing her assignment no matter the content is just wrong. I am in your area a couple times a week and if you want me to go help this teacher understand the err of his ways just say so. I love my kids as we all do so I say don't mess with the kids or you will feel the rath of the rednecks. Tigerman!

  11. Good job by your middle daughter for standing up to him, good on her classmates for not jumping on his (stupid) bandwagon, and good on YOU for exercising enough restraint to send him an email rather than just open up a can of REDNECK on him ...extra spicy kind!

    I would keep close tabs on what happens in that class from here on out. If I had even an INKLING that his apology and supposed change of attitude were insincere, I wouldn't bother to contact the teacher again daughter would be out of that class and going with me to a meeting with the principal and school superintendent. That teacher would rue the day...

  12. Paint me cynical, but I question the sincerity of the apology. Why would he act in such a manner in the first place, if it wasn't how he truly felt. I wonder if the apology is just an attempt to appease you in the hopes the manner will go away.

    I am happy with the professional way you approached the manner. While anger is easy, temperance is much more effective. And, should it become necessary to escalate the matter, you will have proven to be a reasonable person.

  13. I have to say that I am proud of how you handled this. Reacting in a negative way would have only made it worse, and by sending the email, you now have proof that he not only did it, but gave what I believe to be a half hearted attempt to calm you down. I agree with the others. I would send a copy to the principal, superintendant, and the school board. With the addition of a note that said you resoloved it with the teacher, but want his behavior on record for when it happens again.... and I am sure that it will.God bless your daughter for her courage, and you for your love and caring!

  14. It is not age as much as it is experience in how we handle ourselfs in life.

    Well done sir.

  15. Sounds like you handled it well!

    But I have to agree with some others, I would be keeping very close tabs on that one! I think his apology could be less that sincere, but maybe it is. What a sad sad state of affairs that a teacher would do that to a student. Not much a teacher in my way of thinking. That's pretty darn bad!

  16. Just be careful of who you and your family talk to about your prepping plans... not everyone is who they say they are

  17. You did real good! And I am very impressed with your daughter too! The idiot teacher obviously is insecure and feels the need to humiliate others to make himself feel good. In reality he is probably a miserably unhappy person. He is in need of prayer, it sometimes help ease the anger when you pray for people that you would rather release the "redneck" on.

  18. He still deserves a punch in the throat...

  19. Thank you everyone for your kind words on this matter. Being many comments were close to the same I grouped together my responses to the like replies. If you want a individual reply then just let me know.

    Shepherd K, Stephen, Duke, Anonymous #1, Coley, Genevieve, Anonymous #2 -
    I did not send a copy to any other than him. This guy has always been a great teacher and I think he just got a little comfortable at his job. I did however save the back and forth emails and told my daughter to let me know if he even rolls his eyes at her. I hate for anyone lose their job in this day and age but further actions will be taken if one more little thing happens. He said he was going to apologize to her on Monday and I told my daughter to make sure and have a witness with her when he does.

    dakotas5 - Most are and I explained that to my daughter. They grew up in a subdivision, had their college paid for and now live in the same environment as they grew up in. It is all they know.

    Phelan - If it happens again you can bet all pleasantries are out the window.

    SciFiChick - And I do not want to give any out anymore. It hurts to bad in the mornings.

    Izzy - Thank you

    Tigerman - I hope it does not come to that. I am sure it will not. Thank you for having my back though. I might need bail money. LOL It would not be the first time.

    Hossboss, Dave, Texan, Shar -
    Being that I know this teacher and we have talked before on different matters I do think he just screwed up and thought he was being funny. There will be no mercy the next time.

    Rob - Thanks buddy

    Matt - I read the whole thing and that scared the crap out of me. OMG Thanks for sharing. Everyone with kids should read it.

  20. Hillbilly - I do agree and I really do not want it to get to that point. I am a peaceful Redneck now, but one more time and I will up my aggressiveness in this matter.

  21. This is one of the main reasons me and my wife do not believe in public school. I am glad to see you handling the matter in a pleasant and intelligent fashion jerry. If it were me, I probably would have beaten the teacher up in a public setting. Tell your daughter I said she should never feel ashamed about her family no matter what anyone thinks. In the end they will be all you have. Good for her for standing up for her beliefs. She sounds like a chip off the old block.

  22. MDR - MY blood is BOILING! and i want nothing more than to come down there and kick that teacher's *ss like i know you want to do. this is so completely uncalled for, and when i think of BlueEyedBaby, and how well she seems to have been raised, with intelligence, her father's artistic sense, and her sensitivity - i can only imagine what your other daughter went through during that class. yes - my blood is boiling too!

    i am just glad that all of your girl's have an intelligent and mature father. and buddy - if you want me to come down there and kick some *ss - you just holler!

    your friend,

  23. Matt said...

    and didn't THAT just have a LOVELY 'sunset/sunrise at castle rock' vibe!
    thanks for the link matt.

    MDR, congrats on keeping your cool. You have proven who the more worthwhile human is in this by your actions and laudable restraint. And yes, the temptation to meet that type of bully in kind is best deferred... darnnit.

  24. jake - Public schools were our only choice and I do believe in them still to this day. If I had to do it all over again I might have made the decision to send them to privet school. I am all for home schooling and believe it is the best way to go if you do it right.

    Kymber - Thanks for having my back. The funny thing is, this was BlueEyedBaby's favorite teacher. That is why when I told her about it she said she could not believe it leading me to think this guy just got a little too comfortable in his job.

    Elizabeth - Very well put my friend and I agree ten fold.

  25. My mom always said, "A leopard never changes his spots." Watch him. He's probably a very lonely man. Picking on your daughter that way made him feel important, then, he realized his mistake when the other kids were on her side. He's a snake and you handled it the correctly.

  26. He behaved like a bully. If your daughter had a small tape recorder on her and had recorded his words you would probably have grounds for a lawsuit. If it ever happens again please consider it or have one of the other students record it with a cell phone or something.

  27. Sharon - I have many eyes on him right now and he knows it.
    Thank you

    Anonymous - I agree he was. We will see what happens.

  28. MDR - i always got your back buddy!

  29. You did the right thing. But, if he does it again, I would go to the school board and demand he lose his job for bullying. Then, he would have wished that HE would have been prepping! lol.

  30. SFG - No worry, I let him know in my last email.

  31. Perhaps you SHOULD give the kids a tour. It would be good PR for your cause. You could even invite His Nibs.

  32. George - I told the Daughter to let me finish the Solar Bathhouse and then I want her to bring over as many as she wants.
    Not a bad idea on inviting him but I do not know how much my niceties are left with this guy.

  33. Peers not Piers, those are what boats use.

  34. Anon - LOL I didn't even notice. I guess auto correct is not a mind reader after all.