Thursday, July 11, 2013

There's Something About The Game

What is it about putting a little ball in a little hole 400 yards away that makes this game so frustrating and fun all at the same time?

When I was in school playing football, we always poked fun at the golf team. We would say they were not "real" athletes and downed the game pretty hard.
After all that was over and later on when someone would talk about golf I just laughed. I actually thought the game was gay and everyone who played it was to. Give me a football, bowling ball or baseball any day but golf, no way.
Then one day I was challenged. I was told I couldn't even hit the ball off the tee. Me, never backing down from a challenge I said, "lets do it."
My friend and I, along with several others, walked to his back yard. He teed up a ball then handed me the driver. "Here you go big boy" he said in his best gay tone, only because I said the game was gay.
Being mister macho man I grabbed the club like a baseball bat and walked right up to the ball and stared swinging.
He was right, the first swing I missed the ball by a mile swinging so hard I spun myself around in a circle. "Your suppose to hit the ball, not dance with it" someone mocked.
 The second shook my whole body because I hit full club right into the dirt. I took a step back, listened to the sarcasm coming from the group, I didn't think was all that funny. I hit the ball on my third swing, but it was a little dribble that whent about ten feet. Laughter erupted and I was shamed.
The smallest guy in the group walked up, set the ball on the tee, and spanked that thing so hard I lost it in the clouds. "That's how it's done my giant friend" he said as more laughter was echoing through my ears.

Well that did it for me, I couldn't let something I thought was so simple beat me like that. A week or so later I went and bought a set of clubs and a bunch of balls. For the next year I practiced two to three times a week by hitting balls out into the pasture then chipping them back up the hill. I put flags out and almost had my own course of sorts, but nothing real fancy. I thought I was getting good then I started going to a real golf course and found out real quick I sucked worse than most. The first set of clubs I bought are still at the bottom of a pond at the TWU course in Denton. 
I kept my focus, quit throwing the clubs and improved a whole bunch. Before long I was invited to play in some tournaments at some really nice courses around Texas. Then, I just stopped playing.

Three weeks ago was the first time I stepped foot on a golf course in eight years. I can tell you it's not like riding a bike. All my old habits came back and by the 12th hole I could remember why I hated and loved the game so much.
Last weekend I was up in Oklahoma with the wife as my caddy playing a wonderful course for the first time. We had a great time just being out and together.  I was paired up with an older couple who put me to shame, but they were polite about it.
I plan on playing at least once a month. I still suck just as bad as I always have, but it's those one or two great shots that keep me coming back for more.

So there you go, My name is MDR and I am a redneck golfer.

I'm Out,


  1. HaHahaaaa, I'd have love to have seen the expression on your face as that little guy smacked that ball, my giant friend! lollllll

    I wish I had known you were in Oklahoma last weekend. You missed out on the BBQ dammit. It might not be as good as yours is but enjoying it with friends was priceless.

    1. Sci, I wished I knew y'all were having a Blog connection and BBQ and I would have stopped by. Maybe next time.