Tuesday, August 19, 2014

Dreams Do Come True

We all have our ideas and dreams for our children. Some work out and others, not so much.
After a certain time in the child's life we can no longer control the dreams and goals we had for them. I think it's around the time they start to have future ideas of their own is when the path between yours and theirs starts to split off and go in different directions. Even with that we still try and persuade them to see it our way and to go the direction we had planned for them from the beginning. After all, we know whats best right?

I struggled with this the most. I had a plan for each one of my girls and they were going to do it come hell or high water. I almost lost one of my girls last year because of my stubbornness on this. She had her dreams and I had mine for her. The main problem was, they were no where near each other.
I dealt with it, moved on and saw it was not worth driving away a loved one just because it's not how I planned it. It never really was about who she was marring or anything of the sorts, it was all about the timing of it, he was just an excuse I guess. She needed to get her education first before starting a family, that was all. Why make yourself climb over a mountain when there is a tunnel already built for you to go through? (I know the many answers to this, I'm just making a point)
Even some of my own family has held it against me for my actions in this matter and I'm sure for other reasons as well. They don't have a dog in this fight.
Even though the paths of my girls my not go in the exact direction I had planned, I guess the fact of all those years with me pounding it in their heads might have done some good. In the back of their minds they all know I'm right and they also know all I want is the best for each of them, even if it's on their own terms.
Next to having all my girls with a college degree, one of my biggest dreams was to have all three of my girls going to college. That in it's self is monumental. College is not for everybody and that was an idea I would not except until here recently. As it is, dreams do come true sometimes.
Jessie, my oldest, left for her senior year at Texas A&M Saturday. It was a bitter-sweet moment I guess. I hated to see her go or course, but knowing this is her last year and then she will be back up here to start her career and life makes it better. This time next year I will have a College Graduate. We will be going down September 19th for her ring ceremony and from what I hear it will be one of the best days of her life. I am wondering if I should wear a suit and tie.

Hannah starts back to college this month. She had to take a semester off due to my grand baby needing to be born. I know it will hard for her because I did it. I had three young girls, two jobs and took night courses. Her mountain is a little harder to climb now, but knowing her, that's how she likes it. The harder the challenge the better the reward. I am very proud of her for continuing this journey. The scenery is prettier at the top of the mountain anyway.  

This semester will be Kylee's first in college. I know she is in for a shock about how much time and work this is going to take. I feel she thinks this is going to be as easy as high school, but she will learn, we all did. I hope she stays excited and continues to the end. I am waiting until I hear the words, "Holy crap dad, we have to write so many papers!" I know it's coming, they all say it.

I may be done with their raising, but I'm not done being their daddy. I am really liking the fact I can be more of a friend and adviser now than a strict parent. They all still need their shoulders turned in the right direction from time to time, but I guess I even need it every once and a while myself.

Thanks for your ear,


  1. Jerry - No parent ever relinquishes their duty to their children. Yes, some children don't get it then, but they do get it eventually.

    All any of us can do is our best :)

    Congrats on Jessie's imminent graduation.

    Your other two will make you proud - they have an excellent role model in their father :)

  2. Jerry, I'm with you when we returned to Mn last year my oldest son stayed in Fla. It been hard on us the family, and him. I realize that he needs to do his own thing, and at the same time I know he is struggling. We have done our job as parents teaching right from wrong now the ball is in their court. My kids know that the door is open, and the outside light will also always be on,

    1. All mine know the door is open. I think that is the best we can do. That way they always have an alternative.
      Thanks for the comment Rob.

  3. all i can say, buddy, is that it has been an awesome journey for all of you! i have enjoyed your sharing your journey here...and i have learned much from yours and candy's daddy-momma skills. i am so happy that your girls are doing so well, and i can't wait for more updates on them and on your new plans with the tiny house. these are exciting times for you and candy, being that you are still so young and yer chilluns are growed. you both, as well as your daughters, are embarking on new stages of your lives. i find it all pretty exciting and am glad to be along for the ride.

    our best, as always, to you and yours! your friend,

    1. Thank you Kymber for the kind comment. It has been one hell of a journey so far with more to come.

  4. That's when you know you are a good dad......... You care.

    1. I might care too much SFG.
      Thanks for the comment.

  5. MDR,

    We have a similar situation with our girls presently. Unfortunately the family members in question are my own parents. Puts me in a weird position; first of all they talk about me behind my back to my OWN children and other relatives, second they get involved in something they know very little about. I've confronted them on it, they think we're just mean parents, and we haven't spoken to them or our girls since Thanksgiving time last year. It's a tough situation, we pray for our girls everyday. Hopefully they'll be like the "prodigal son" and come home eventually.

    Congrats on all three being in college. I'm sure someday we'll all look back at these days and we'll grateful we went through them, and that we've moved beyond them.

    1. Thanks Izzy. I hope they all stick with it and make it to the end. The rewards are worth the struggle for all of them.

  6. Congratulations! You did well! People always said I was too protective and too hard on my children. I have two boys in the Army and Michelle in college, they can all bite me now, lol.